Posts Tagged ‘Mishaps’

Paddleboat Cruise with Lewis & Clark

December 27th, 2009



In May my husband and I took a wonderful steamboat trip on the Colombia River, 1,240 miles long, and Snake River, 1,038 miles long, aboard the American West’s Empress of the North. This is the first time we had ever done a “niche” type cruise and we thoroughly enjoyed it.

Yes, the clientele tends to be older, but, what a shame that the younger mature adults are missing out on all this fun. It is steam boating in the true sense of the word. The paddlewheel turns as you leisurely make your way up and down the rivers and through the many dams that have been erected since the time of Lewis and Clarke. The ship is patterned after the river boats that plied the waters of Alaska, Oregon and Washington over 100 years ago and has a distinctly Russian flavor.

On the particular adventure that we took it was to follow the path of the Lewis and Clarke expedition so it was historical as well as fun. We boarded the Empress of the North in Portland, Oregon with no mishaps just a bit of a long wait. However, they did supply entertainment and refreshments while they prepared the ship for us. Once aboard we were escorted to a lovely stateroom that was right out of the riverboat era. It was roomy, beautifully decorated and had a balcony with two chairs and a table. There was a TV but we never used it since the real entertainment was the trip and the excursions which were included in the price of the cruise. The rooms reminded you of the river boat era but were very much up to modern standards.

Just a little tidbit: The “Portland Penny” is how Portland got its name narrowly missing being called Boston. The partners Lovejoy and Pettygrove who had filed the claim staking the territory needed to come up with a name for the quickly expanding territory. Lovejoy being from Boston, Massachusetts was adamant that this would be the name, while Pettygrove equally adamant wanted it to be called Portland after his beloved Portland, Maine. Hence the “Portland Penny” when Pettygrove won two out of the three tosses.

The artwork on the Empress was truly impressive. There were beautiful Russian artifacts and amazing pictures of the gold rush and life in the Northwest during the 1800’s. I spent a lot of time just going up and down the four hallways perusing the artwork. (Every floor has a different theme).

Our first night out of Portland we were invited to cocktails and hors d’oeurves at the Paddlewheel lounge which is in the back of the boat and has windows overlooking the paddle wheel. We were still busy getting situated so we grabbed a cocktail and took it back to our room to get organized. Dinner was in the Romanov Dining room and the atmosphere really was one of a riverboat. The food was very good served by a courteous and fun American crew. Dinner lasted about an hour to an hour and a half and then it was off to the Golden Nugget showroom to watch the Pat O’Neal and the River Boat Jazz band play great Dixieland Music. Well, if you weren’t into it by then you never were going to be. What fun and you are sharing it with only 200 other passengers. After the show you could stay in the Showroom for dancing or go to the Paddlewheel Lounge for the duo of Kari & Jerry who were not only very good but extremely friendly.

Of course, you are in a new place everyday and everyday brings a new exciting, educational and different excursion. Our first day out we where cruising the Columbia River Gorge taking in the breathtaking vistas, granite cliffs and waterfalls from which the Cascade Mountains takes it’s name.

We thoroughly enjoyed this trip and would recommend to other adults, this is not a ship for children.

By: Mary Hanna

Deep Inside Colombia – Crossing The Andes With A Surfboard

November 18th, 2009



I’ll never forget the look on the face of that Colombian campesino man. My wife just explained to him in Spanish that what I am holding under my arm is indeed a surfboard, despite the fact that we were standing in a Colombian village that was located somewhere in the middle of the Andes Mountains, hundreds of miles away from any ocean. After hearing this news the man made a joke about us getting bad directions. He then flashed a smile that revealed a mouth full of rotten teeth. Soon after that he shook his head, tucked his hands into the front pockets of his hand-woven Inca style poncho, turned, and moved on down the only street in his town. When the man reached the center of town a gust of wind swept down the street and blew the black fedora hat off his head. As I was watching him chase after it through a cloud of dust, I thought to myself; “I gotta’ get to the ocean.”

I was beginning to feel like a fish out of water. Surfers cannot stay away from the ocean for too long, or they start to “dry out”. As I was standing on that dirt street in that dusty little town, I realized that I had not seen the ocean in over a month. More importantly, I had not surfed in it. Halfway through a two month excursion across the country of Colombia, in South America, we were on our way to a small Caribbean beach resort on the northeastern edge of the country for a much needed break from the madness we had experienced so far on that trip. We had spent the holidays traveling from Bogotá to Medellín, and then back to Bogotá again to meet and visit with various different members of my wife’s family. There had been some mishaps along the way involving pick-pockets and miscreants. Up to that point it was not fun, and we will leave it at that.

Traveling on a tight budget in a foreign country is the best way to experience the true culture of that country, but it can be quite taxing on your soul. We could not afford plane tickets to fly all over the country, so we had to take busses and taxis instead. Some of those bus rides took over two days to reach our destination. We traveled through some of the most remote areas of Colombia, changing busses and hailing taxis the whole way. Along the way we saw some of the most beautiful scenery on earth, and experienced some very interesting, intense, and strange things. Black magic and evil curses are practiced in many areas of Colombia, and I cannot say any more on that subject, for fear that you would think of me as crazy. There are things that cannot be explained in this world, and a lot of them happen in Colombia.

There were other things that happened to us that were even more terrifying than black magic. Let’s just say it’s never a good thing to have your bus stopped in the middle of the night by rough looking men with machine guns on a winding, dark, mountainous road. That is whole other story for another time.

Back to our main story; we were about four hours North of Bucaramanga, and waiting to board yet another one of those colorful busses. All I could think about at that moment was surfing and relaxing at this place called Tayrona. I was told you can sit in your own thatched-hut “choza” and watch the waves from your front porch. For those who are not familiar with the sport of surfing, that sounds about as good as it gets for a surfer.

It had not been easy carrying that surfboard all over Colombia. We landed in Bogotá in the middle of the country a month before, and I had been schlepping it around with our other luggage from one bus or taxi to the other ever since. It was like I was living my own little version of the movie
Fitzcaraldo, and my surfboard was the ship that was being carried for many miles across dry land. I was determined to make the effort pay off.

While we were waiting for our bus in that little mountain village we were inundated by the usual local people trying to sell us stuff. My wife, being a Colombian native did most of the talking for those negotiations. These little villages along the main roads of Colombia survive on money from people who are just passing through, or waiting for a bus. The local indigenous people sell everything from bags of purified water, to homemade “empanadas” (a meat and potato filled turnover made with corn-meal dough). My wife and I had been surviving on food and water provided by those people for most of our trip. Amazingly, neither of us had been sick yet. Albeit, most of this food had been delicious, you have to wonder about the cooking and cleaning practices in a town that has no running water. Something tells me that if the cook had a choice between using their last bucket of water to wash their hands before cooking, or having water to drink the next day, they’d forego the cleanliness. I tried not to think about stuff like that on that trip. I only thought about how much flavor those homemade items had with their homegrown ingredients.

People sure know how to cook in Colombia. Wow! The food in that country just seemed to have a lot more flavor than the food I was used to in the United States. We really experienced the authentic food of Colombia; “buñuelos, “pandebonos”, “arepas”, you name it and we tried it along
the way. We were on a budget, yet eating very good food. The people who made this food were as poor as one could be, but they could make food like no-one else on earth. The freshness, lack of pesticides, and the nutrient-rich soils also have a lot to do with why the food tastes so good in Colombia.

After we ate our share of “empanadas” that we purchased from a little old village woman carrying a hand-woven basket, we were ready for a freshly blended fruit smoothie. There were always several of these little smoothie stands in every town that we stopped at along the way, and we always made sure that we sampled at least one. No matter how small of a stand, the vender always had electricity to run their blender, ice box, and boom-box. I immediately ordered a couple of “tomate de árbol “smoothies at a nearby stand, and then we sat down on an old wooden bench provided by the smoothie vendor.

We were told by the driver of the last bus that our next bus should be along in “no time at all”. It had been my experience up to that point that this bus driver may, or may not be right. Sometimes the bus came right away and the transfer went smoothly. Other times we ended up waiting long periods of time between transfers. Those ones did not go so smoothly.

The mountain roads and leftist guerilla laden areas that these busses travel through can cause long delays, to say the least. Hanging out in that small town in the middle of nowhere in the foothills of the Andes Mountains waiting for a bus was quite nerve-racking. The local people of those types of towns were always very suspicious of anyone that stayed behind after a bus came through. Most people just passed right through. They were especially suspicious of a Gringo with a surfboard and a Colombian wife. There was a war going on in that country. Everywhere we went everyone wanted to know whose side we were on. As we were sitting in that dusty, one-horse town in a remote area of Colombia, I knew we were in for a long, harrowing wait.

By: Michael Connelly